Teenage boys eat A LOT. Or rather they go through phases were they eat a lot and then one day, they stop. only to resume a week or a month or whatever time frame suits your fancy later.
Based on the changes that we have made in our family around food,
Here are my top 10 tips for feeding said ravenous monster in a healthy way that you can manage:
1. Buy more food, buy in bulk
2. Prepare ahead of time
3. Set rules and boundaries and expectations
4. Allow and expect Snacking
5. Don’t shame them
6. Allow choices
7. Educate them
8. Make them participate
9. Introduce variety
10. Eat with them
Buy more food (than you think you are going to need).
Not all food - Just the food that you know he will need or want (or the things you are going to want him to eat) This means if you are going to make burgers for dinner, buy enough meat to make double or even triple what you would normally buy for your meal plan. If your teenager is playing a sport or is any way active they might actually consume more than their normal share at meal times. I watched my son methodically shove three brats into his mouth the other evening without thinking twice about it. This is not to say that this is normal and happens everyday. BUT, if it is something that you know he likes, something he will grab when needing food, buy more and make more.
Buy in Bulk.
Go to Costco (or whatever larger wholesale grocery store you have near you) and save yourself some time and money. I buy the largest bag of celery stalks, the large container of grapes, several large containers of whatever berries he loves. If you know what he likes and he is willing to eat it, buy as much of it as you think he could go through that week.
Prepare food ahead of time
If you have the things you want him to eat, things he is willing to eat, all cut and prepared and easy to grab it cuts down on the mess, the fuss and likelihood that he will eat other junk. If he had to cut and prepare the veggies himself, I know he wouldn’t eat them. He would rather grab something quick. So I make it easy for him.
This encourages the healthy snacking and eating. It makes him feel good knowing he is doing the right thing for himself, his body is healthier and that makes you feel good.
In some ways this is a bit of a manipulation, which I am not above when it comes to getting what I want with my son's health. Because I know this trick, that he will eat whatever is easiest, I make it easiest to grab the healthy stuff. And I make it really tough to get the unhealthier stuff.
Set rules and boundaries
Expressing expectations is one of those things that has saved me a ton of arguments with our son.
If you give them a reasonable set of guidelines and they are largely free to roam within them, they will do really great. My son tends to wander closely to the line while occasionally crossing it, but otherwise I just remind him of the rules and he tends to bounce back into the middle to roam.
Set portion size rules. I set expectations about bowls and portion sizes. I make this incredibly clear. If I am very specific about what kind of bowl he has to use (and maybe even get rid of the bowls I don’t want him to use) then there is less argument later.
Putting things in bowls rather than eating out of bags or containers cuts down on over eating. It is not bottomless, it doesn’t go on forever and you have to stop when it is all gone.
Give them amount guidelines. "1 bowl of chips, not the giant serving bowl, but the blank - insert cereal, soup, salad - bowl".
I have made more rules and boundaries for our family about the junk food, but created very wide and open rules around the healthier foods. Again, this may be a bit of manipulation, but it seems to be working. They eat a lot more vegetables and fruits for snacks than ever before. AND they treat the dry foods like plantain chips, popcorn and things more as cherished foods. They tend to regard them as a treat and save them to make sure they portion it out so they get a little each day.
Allow snacking. Expect it.
Again, set boundaries here. Allowing them to eat in between meals is rather necessary at this point. I know that most adults seem to always be dieting, which may or may not allow for snacking. but as your teenager is growing, snacking just seems to be important. Teenage boys are hungry. all the time.
If you have followed the above rules and expectations, the snacking should be no problem.
Don’t shame them.
This tip is especially important, and I felt really strongly about putting it here. As an adult who has gone through life and probably spent a lot of that time being bombarded with images of being skinnier and healthier, we have really strong feelings about food and eating. That applies to us as adults, who are grown and not going through the kind of changes they are going through as teenagers.
It seems that they can’t help it. They are just hungry. Sometimes it irritates me and I get bothered by the constant snacking. I have been known to accuse him of boredom. At the same time, he really honestly seems hungry. Sometimes he really seems like he could die if doesn’t get something into his mouth as quickly as possible. Even on those nights at 10pm where he has already eaten a late afternoon snack, filled up his dinner plate 2-3 times and then looks at you with sad doe eyes…. what are you going to do?
I allow him something healthy to eat and watch with amazement as he guzzles it down.
Allow him to make some choices
Allow him to dictate some of the meal plan each week. Give him the opportunity to tell you what he wants to eat. We let everyone participate in our meal plan each week, giving everyone a chance to pick one at least dinner that we will make. This gives them a sense of control as well as importance. They are making a choice that will affect the whole family not just themselves.
Also give them a choice about what snacks and other foods you will purchase. Within certain boundaries they should be able to tell you what things they would like to include in their lunches and what seems to be in their wheel house at the time.
Educate him
I strongly urge Education. We have spent the last couple of years really teaching our kids (and ourselves) about health. Through documentaries, research and our own experiments and experience, we've made sure that our teenagers understand how food is affecting their bodies. They are really intelligent human beings, and with some guidance can really make a difference in their own lives through their intake and treatment of their bodies.
Request Participation
This could be meal planning, grocery shopping or meal preparation. I include my son in all of the above. Having my son pick a meal, tell me what he wants in his lunch and snacks is great and causes me a lot less heartache and a lot less arguments later. I don't over buy, I don't buy things he hasn't asked for or indicated he wants and therefore I am wasting less food. Also including him in the grocery shopping run helps him understand the process, what it takes to provide him with meals and instills a greater sense of awareness and appreciation for what he is eating. He knows that it just doesn't magically appear for him to consume.
Include Variety
Introduce them to new foods. Try new things. With our family going through an elimination diet, we found a lot of new things to incorporate into our diet. We always include a green vegetable in our meals, if we don't have one for some reason, we always add a green leaf salad.
As produce is rotated through seasons, we add or subtract things from our menus and offerings. This really helps to keep things fresh and changing in our meals.
Eat with them
Eat meals with them. Sit and eat your meals together. In this space where you've not allowed technology, you can learn a lot about your teenager. This is one of the single most important changes we've made in our family that changed our connection with our teens. Teenagers are really funny human beings that are just waiting for the right opportunity to make you laugh with their life experiences. Let them. The connection that you will create with your teenager will delight you.